Emotion and Light in Darkroom

Required blog prompt:  What are three words to describe what you felt when reading Darkroom?
Amazed
Appalled
Sick

I have so much admiration for the artwork of Darkroom and the artistic choices Lila Quintero Weaver made throughout the book.  Her switch to black pages when the night march happens (155 -- 157, 160 -- 169) sets the mood for something heavy and dark to happen.  It's very noticeable because up to this point, the only black pages have been the title and content pages and page 17, when she is in the darkroom.  Her use of light in these scenes is very impressive.  The circles of candlelight and the shadows on the floor as the protesters are walking out of the church (156) and the light on their faces as they emerge from the church are all so well-rendered and just plain pretty.  (Forgive me here:  I'm having a hard time not just writing "It's so good!  It's so good!" repeatedly.)  I find page 157 amazing.  There are so few words, but the ones there and the artwork communicates an almost overwhelming amount of mood, emotion, and experience.  Again, the lighting on the faces is simply beautiful.  The words of the song, printed at the bottom of the first frame and in the gutter are completely contradicted by the expressions on the faces of the protesters.  They look absolutely terrified. The eyes of the two people in the foreground of the first frame are open very wide, conveying fear.  The person behind them, on the left has a bowed head and closed eyes, which to me suggests prayer as a method of combat against fear.  I know that the crowd is singing, but their open mouths make them look more vulnerable somehow, which reinforces the impression of fear.  The fear on this page is almost palpable.  I had to just sit with this page when I first read it.  It demands attention and empathy.  I have no idea how to read this book, and this section in particular, without having a very emotional experience.

Audra and Shaina's presentation came to mind a lot while I was reading Darkroom, but I found myself empathizing more with the mass of protestors, nameless faces, more than with the narrator/author, which is not to say that I did not empathize with her, too.  I think her choice to bring a few people in the crowd really close to the reader is responsible for that.  They look so afraid, and with very good reason, and seeing that fear in such detail forces acknowledgement of that fear and of the likelihood that every single protester is feeling that same way.  The candles held so close to their faces not only provides very lovely light; it emphasizes vulnerability.  They are walking out of the church with their hands in plain sight.  This emphasizes the fact that they are unarmed and that their intentions are devoid of violence.

On pages 158 and 159 the gutters are black, but the pages are white again.  The perspective has changed to that of the white people waiting outside the church.  As an audience, we are watching the protesters coming out of the church; we witness them, but we are no longer with them as we were inside the church, with the exception of the cop's eyes at the top of page 159; that is the view of the man at the bottom of page 158.  The cop's eyes are open very wide, but even independent of the dialogue bubble or the context of the story, he does not look afraid to me.  He looks frightening.  I still can't figure out exactly why that is.  I keep looking at that image...I even covered what is above and below it, but I can't figure out why his wide eyes look so threatening.  Maybe it's because the image is such a close-up; he is closer than he should be.  His has entered the personal space of the other man and that is scary.

The perspective changes again to that of the protesters on page 160 through the end of the chapter, and the pages are black again.  Those pages are filled with so much violence and hatred they are hard to read.  They are horrifying.  Also horrifying is the fact that the state trooper who chased an unarmed family into a cafe could claim self defense, especially considering he kept claiming it for over 40 years. Reading this book has been a very emotional experience.  The content of the book is packed with so much emotion that I'm reminded of the image from Audra and Shaina's presentation of the reader/author identification/bonding.  I feel like my emotions and those of the book are in a very symbiotic and circular relationship.